Things Just Not Talked About

Babies are life changing. Duh. I just didn't think about the baby stuff that's not talked about. Today I'm thinking about it.

For my friends with healthy babies ~ you are so blessed. For my friends in those situations not talked about ~ my heart breaks for you.

First: miscarriage. Here's the thing, relatives have miscarried before and (not to sound heartless) I didn't think much about it. A friend miscarried and it affected me much more. This is one of "my people" ~ I realize the first is family, but the second was family that I've chosen so I looked it differently for some reason. Really, I think it affected me more because that friend could be me. I don't know.

Second: adoption. This one's really gotten to me. More so because I'd never thought much about the male perspective on it. Today I thought about it. As a female, you end up as the executive decision maker on that one usually. I can't even begin to imagine what that is like to make that decision. As a male, one the decision is made you just get to go along with it. I realize there's all sorts of situations and such when this decision is made, but I'm just thinking generally today. To hear the male side of it today got to me. I had this whole "wow" moment. For a male, pregnancy is mostly a spectator sport ~ face it, guys have the easy job. Or so I thought. When it reaches the point, though, that the responsible one is the male and he realizes what the best situation is for everyone involved and can't dictate that that's how things go.....that's sad.

Really, the words I wanted for this entry just wouldn't come out right and so this is maybe not making any sense, but it is helping me sort my thoughts so....oh well. I think, though, that the words I want wouldn't come because I don't want to explain full situations.

To anyone that's ever miscarried, given a baby up for adoption, or adopted a child...my heart goes out to you. You are brave.